| rfowkes |
| ...showed their disdain for their opponents as did some racquetball competitors. But at least... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….Kinky would always get even in the showers, which was how he got his name in the first place. Meanwhile…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...Mildred had headed to the meat locker to get some... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ……Ben and Jerry’s and started thinking about her date the night before with a funny looking guy who….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...spent the whole evening talking about his misfortunate accident that morning while taking his shower. Because of this... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …it didn’t impress Mildred much because her sister’s name was Lorena Bobbitt and when the funny looking guy heard this he….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
...decided to provide a road map so that nothing important got loped off. However...
 |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …when his buddy “Chip” wanted to split a mutual car they had done some work with… |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...he decided to seek protection from Cousin Tony and... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….was told to work it out on their own and so…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...he decided to put on his Duncan Donuts Mickey Mouse disguise and... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….have that tattoo, his mother had warned him about getting, taken off because of its identifiable characteristics as well as…… |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...the fact that Mr. White wasn't too happy with tattoos in general and had threatened Mr. Pink by... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….giving him a traffic ticket and a choice on how to pay it. This lead to….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...Mr. Pink retreating to the privacy of his bedroom with this personal blow up doll where he... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …put on his best east coast haberdashery and commenced to…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...head out to the chapeau competition where Crazy Donald was preparing to defend his title and... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….some though Dubya’s Mitre was a bit over the top but he didn’t. And there was…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...also Dominic the Prisoner (affectionately known as "Con Dom") entered with his usual attire. Besides that... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….a few dignitaries were present displaying the c*nt caps as well as…… |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...Kermit the Wonder Kat and his good friend... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….Rizzo the bass man and his pal…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...Boombay Summer Ben who quickly found out that the harsh Montana winters weren't too kind to his... |
|
|
| ByeByeChrysler |
....pecker, or his best friend,......
 |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …….Erma who was also looking for….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...where her next brew was coming from. Luckily, her cousin Kazimir had a Palm Pilot so... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …she ended up in downtown Albuquerque where… |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...she went to her favorite liquor store and... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …was promptly strip searched because it looked like she was hiding something under her….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...Tee shirt and naturally, Officer Muldoon was curious as well as thorough. Imagine his surprise when... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …Muldoon found a couple of lotus blossoms from last night’s hula contest at the uranium depot bar and spa over in Trinity. Everyone knew that….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...these flower children came in all shapes and sizes and he was hoping that... |
|
|
| ByeByeChrysler |
...this would bring smiles to all the mens faces,......
 |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...and shock his sister, Mona. However... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …..Muldoon had just about seen it all except for the 3 meter club his sister had joined because of her fondness for finding new and exciting ways to …… |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...reach the higher bookshelves at the library. However, Mona disapproved because... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …that’s where the Marquis De Sade books were kept. Muldoon decided to…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
...ask Mona what to do and she replied,
Keep your eyes peeled... |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...and your ears wide open and you'll soon... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …get the good things in life as well as….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ..an occasional splinter in your butt. However, look at the bright side... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …..you could be in this mans seat, or you could be….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...told you are getting an iPod for Valentine's Day only to be a bit disappointed. Or perhaps... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …seeing the girl you dumped back in high school on the cover of Victoria’s Secret, or |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...find out that blind date with the girl with Mammoth Jugs wasn't quite what you expected. Or... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….being asked by your high school sweetheart to pop her cherry, wasn’t what she had in mind, as well as…… |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...ordering a glass of whole milk and not getting what you wanted, or... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …getting a little more than you asked for at the market. Or perhaps ... |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...having your best friend monkey around with you, or... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …having your best friend do the monkey, or…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...having a close call with your best friend which causes you to release the monkey in public, or... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….getting a comprehensive examination of the monkey by the new nanny, or… |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...be taking your sweetheart out for a romantic Valentine's Day dinner at a restaurant with a most unfortunate name, or... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …..finding out just what kind of wizard your Father really was, or perhaps..... |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...getting confirmation from the X-rays why that little blue pill won't work for you, or maybe... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …..when you found out your daughter had married the leader of a UFO cult or when…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...you discovered your pet had become "Psycho Pussy" and had caused... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….your mother-in-law to move back to the streets. Meanwhile….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...back in D.C. Tricky Dicky was trying to explain why he shot his lawyer friend to the press in his usual fashion. He... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….tried to sound normal, but lets be honest, would you go hunting with this man? His … |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...aim was no better than his performance as a Veep, although he appears to have a much higher opinion of himself than he deserves. In fact... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….it was getting hard to swallow anything he said which is why…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...he tried to divert attention from his ineptitude by dragging out some unrelated decades old dirt once again. However, this time... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …..there were too many witnesses and no one was dead yet, but as usual….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...Dick the Veep (or is that the other way around?) was only emulating his Chief (or is that the other way around?!?). In any event... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ……it looked like the VP would have to come up with a new category on his score card. As the event faded away…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...Tricky Dicky made a few phone calls and... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….realizing he would have to come up with something new the next time he had to take out someone, he….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...decided to call on Big Bertha, who he had previously employed to settle some deviant behavior. As soon as she walked in the room... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …she knew she had not come to the right place and so…… |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...she really shouldn't have been shocked when Big Peter walked through the door and... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …right then she knew why she had taken those music classes with the serpent in high school and proceeded to…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...begin to limber up for what promised to be a night full of... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….Father Knows Best re-runs. As Bertha got the popcorn going, Peter lubed up his…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...wife and told her to "assume the position." Little did he know that... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …she was an agent working for the man in the red socks who hypnotized women out of their thongs. She was after Peter’s…… |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...private stock of assorted brews, but little did she know that he guarded them so closely that he not only slept with them but also... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….helped the cops at CSI. This proved to be….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...a bit of a problem when solving "The Case of the Beercan Murderer" when forensics showed that... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …..the cans had DNA from two know perverts who were wanted in connection to ….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...the theft of the world's biggest Brewski in Wisconsin. This occurred when... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….there was going to be a wet t-shirt contest down at the alibi tavern. It was rumored that….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...Mabel, the lady in white, was carrying a lot more than a sixpack, but that wasn't too surprising since her younger sister was also rumored to be hot to trot in the literal sense. In fact... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….it was so hot that some were crawling to the water, and some were…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...perfectly willing to "tap" other resources outdoors. Meanwhile, back at the bar... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …..the political hubbub over who had more metals was getting to some of the girls. Things really hit the fan when…. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...little Junior found a new way to clean toilets. His... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….parents owned a neighborhood bar where his dad was known to be sh*t faced and called junior little sh*t head because of his duties out back. His mom thought they were full of sh*t and left with….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...her friend, a Sherpa Guide, and opened up a string of urinals in Nepal. She actually... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …developed the first interactive biomass café as well as….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...an extensive line of "Potties For Tots" products that were well received in... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ...South Beach. Some liked to air out their..... |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...grievances and others just prefer to advertise. But... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …Fritz liked to do it all and now he was….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ..."feeling" pretty good about himself. Little did Fritz know that Dawg had other plans for him so... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| ….knowing that dog couldn’t read, he set a trap for dog by letting dog follow him to the trolley and….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...just at the last second, Dawg stepped aside and Kat encountered a shocking ending. After that... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …..the only thing he was good for was running for president as he was more popular than….. |
|
|
| rfowkes |
| ...the guy who currently held the office. A lot of people were hoping that he would enter a different competition and... |
|
|
| Mr. Mom |
| …not make a fool out of himself, however…. |
|
|
|
